okay.

you left and told me 

"you'll be okay"

okay.

except I wasn't.

I told my family

& my friends

& myself

"I'm okay."

but I knew I wasn't.

with every tear on my pillow

every tear in my cereal

every tear on my sleeve

every tear at school that sent me home immediately

because you can't feel at school.

I knew I was being selfish

but so were you

& the tears wouldn't let me stop

you came home 

and somehow that hurt worse than your departure

you moved on

& I'm glad to see you around

but somehow the wounds never healed

& now they're scars.

now they're part of me.